Y’all know I go hard on costumes, and Halloween season fills me with delight. This year, it’s also a time of dramatic juxtaposition.
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Today, my thinking is, “We can do hard things, and it’s easier together.”
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I find such grace in discovering new ways to learn and relearn, to retrain my brain and body to continue to accept and make meaning of exactly where I am today.
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I’m often a very…let’s say...engaged TV and movie watcher. With few exceptions, I find the glowing rectangles to be utterly immersive. It’s probably one of my more specific symptoms of being a highly sensitive person. (Shout out to any other HSPs reading this.)
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Loving reminder: sometimes the best thing we can do is remove ourselves from a situation — give ourselves time to reset and seek out something that offers comfort or joy.
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Moments of connection and delight tend to pass right by if we don't pay attention, especially if we don’t share them. Talking about the session with my friend, I started out agitated as hell, depleted, stuck in a loop of frustration. At the time, I’d describe my level of motivation as zero-adjacent...possibly negative? With my friend’s support, I shifted my perspective to finding joy infusions,
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That’s the question a therapist asks in the book Evvie Drake Starts Over. She explains that with a pair of pliers and some perseverance, it’s physically possible to pull your own tooth. However, things are far less difficult and less painful when you get support.
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Embracing my inadequacy relieved me of the burden of ‘failing’ – I wasn’t failing; I was surviving an impossible circumstance..
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Whether a natural disaster, fussy baby, or work meeting (rudely scheduled in the middle of a work day!) prevented you from attending, I get it. This moment is a lot to navigate, and logistics can be hellish. I’m in your corner, my loves, and it’s not too late to join in!
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These last few days, I’ve been thinking a lot about what I’m calling “non-toxic positivity.” Toxic positivity silences negative emotion. It forces ourselves and others to pretend to be happy or look only at the bright side. Eff. That. Non-toxic positivity honors the complexity and trauma of this moment while seeking out opportunities for joy and connection.
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A category 3 (maybe 4?) hurricane is set to make landfall in my beloved New Orleans this Sunday, on the 16 year anniversary of Katrina. Today, as I prepare to evacuate to Atlanta, I’m reminded of moments of pure joy amidst the grief of Katrina.
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It was a quote from her child’s teacher who explained, "It took some time for me to realize that pandemic best may be all we have right now. And to hold anyone to something other than that just isn't fair."
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I’m sharing my fears with you to acknowledge that even as someone who has built a business around personal vulnerability, I experience hesitation and sometimes intense anxiety about putting myself out there.
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I’ve long believed it’s perfectly healthy to experience a full range of emotions, but these days I experience all the feels amplified and accelerated. We’re stuck on the spin cycle, feeling a ridiculous range of emotions all in one day, except when we feel totally numb instead. Here’s what I know: moments of meaning, connection, and joy can help stabilize us.
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I’m sharing my fears with you to acknowledge that even as someone who has built a business around personal vulnerability, I experience hesitation and sometimes intense anxiety about putting myself out there.
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When I notice I’m getting impatient with myself and start to think, “We’ve been doing this for 18 months. I should be better at these decisions,” I try to remember: Yes, I’ve been in these situations and negotiations before. Yes, and…
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Fast forward to today, my new negotiation course is the single (nonhuman) thing I’m most proud of having created. It takes you step-by-step through the negotiation process in a format that’s as supportive as it is delightful.
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When friends and clients ask with excitement how I’m feeling as I launch my new brand, core values, and negotiation course, I tell them the truth:
“If you gave me a list of emotions, I’d circle them all.”
It’s been a wild ride!
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Recognizing that instinct to stay small and play it safe is going to be an ongoing practice (I notice my hands are sweating as I type). But, as I wrote in my journal, the trip and the resulting certainty felt like a clarifying – a brightening.
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We can diffuse feelings far faster when we allow the emotions to flow, regardless of how trivial their origin might feel.
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